The Girl From The ZOOM Table
It was just another ordinary Sunday and the only reason why the outside temperature was colder than my run was that it was the middle of January. I remember that night very well. I was playing three tables of NL50 Zoom and I wasn’t giving money away. I played strong and eager for pots, focusing better than Nikon d7100 and thinking every spot through.
Unfortunately, similarly to Johnny Depp’s famous Edward character, I simply wasn’t getting any hands. It did not make me feel very well and at some point during the game it all became this dull ordinary bad session I was just waiting to finally quit.
Until it happened.
I remember that night very well. I do because the moment I first saw her my time bank stopped beating. She popped up at one my tables and I immideately took notice of her.
There was something special about her and I am not only talking about the fact that she bought in for 72 big blinds. The more I was looking at her, the more I was falling in love with her. She had the stats of a high stakes goddess. I mean,she was the kind of girl that could challenge Liay5 to HU4ROLLZ and win pre-rakeback.
She had the perfect VPIP to PFR ratio, ideal sizing and a river aggresion percentage that could bring any man to its kneens. Or at least his bankroll for that matter. I was shaking all over the place, timing out on all my other tables while trying to figure out how to approach her. I was too afraid to make a move on her.
Not knowing what to do and not wanting to blow the whole thing up I just open-limped. I don’t recall what my hole cards were, to be honest, but it did not matter. That moment, I wasn’t playing the cards – I was playing her. Sitting in the big blind, I was shocked and thrilled that the action folded to her, meaning we were now face to face.
I was getting more and more shaky. After seconds of consideration, she gently checked. She checked! She did not raise, but I was still very unsure about what is going on as it could mean two things: she either wanted to keep me in the game or signalled that she had no interest of investing in... us... whatsoever.
The flop was a complete disaster. I remember that just like an internet enthusiast on a vacation in Somalia, I did not come anywhere close to connecting. Being a true lady, she checked again, probably wanting to have a man take the initiative. But I wasn't read to initiate anything, failing to create any contact with her stack both on the flop and the turn. I was desperate and sick of myself the moment I checked the turn as well.
I needed something. I needed something and I needed it badly. I made a quick glance at my graph hoping it would boost my confidence, but the only thing the results I saw did was add to my back pain. Grim, I moved the focus of my eyes back to the table and saw the river card.
It was a heart! I mean, it whiffed my hand completely, but you see... a HEART! It was a sign from the poker gods showing me the potential, the chance. There was a heart lying on the table and we were both sharing it. It was there just for her and me. This miracle empowered me to do as I intended from the time I saw her and without a moment's hesitation I approached her with my proposal:
I slid 15 dollars accross the table. It was almost a third of my stack, but she was worth it.
If it wasn't for the colonoscopy I underwent a couple months before, these would had been the longest seconds I had ever experienced in my life. I was sweating more than Alan Meltzer on fifth season of High Stakes Poker and she was taking a great deal of time contemplating my offer.
After several forevers, she finally called and this moment marked the first time ever I threw up in excitement. Thank goodness this wasn't a live setting. I missed the showdown because of that, but I quickly put my shit together (not THAT shit) and took a glance back at the screen, trying to process that my dreams are about to become true.
But as I did, cold breeze swept through my body as we were both being switched to new tables and torn apart.
After all, she was the girl from the ZOOM table and I never ever saw her again.
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